Chapter 85: You aren’t sexist? Really?
Steph’s POV—Friday Morning
Conference 1 is silent. I have a thick stack of papers in front of me: the results of the branch.
“I’ve found out why we keep losing contracts.”
Each man looks at me, some hostile, mostly curious.
“I noticed a pattern when I reviewed the contracts lost. Consistently, it was women who held the final say so on hiring RangeMan. I expect they hired us because who else could provide so many handsome, buff men?” I smile and I can see a few smiles in the group. Most of the men have put their blank faces into place.
“However, when I reviewed the non-renewals or notices of termination, it was these same women who terminated our services. I was curious to find out why.”
At this point, the lights dim and the voices of our former clients came through the loudspeakers.
“I mean, I like <BLEEP>, but sometimes he acted as if I didn’t have two brain cells to rub together. He acted as if walking was too complicated for me and I should allow him to make all decisions.” Client snorts. “I know I’m flighty and sometimes I have a hard time making decisions, but I really really wanted to tell him that before I became a wife and stay at home mom, I was on the fast track to a legal partnership. I’m no idiot. I can make decisions. His job was to protect me, not to act as if he needed to think for me too.”
“Oh God, where do I start with your bodyguards, Ms. Plum? Let’s see, rude, arrogant, pushy, think I don’t have the sense God gave a gnat, shall I continue? I cycled through three of them before I finally gave up, and I gave up because the head of the group was a sexist asshole! No, thank you. My current bodyguard knows the lay of the land. He knows he’s number four and I will fire him too, if needed.”
“Did you speak to the head of the branch?”
“Yes, right before I fired the last one. I swear, it’s the only reason I don’t scream about RangeMan. He apologized and actually refunded me the money I paid for the last bodyguard, saying he would rather have a chance to earn my business back than have me upset and paying for a person who disrespected me.” The voice calms. “You know, out of all the men I ever came into contact with, he’s the only one who was actually respectful. And he didn’t drag his feet on refunding the last bodyguard either. I had the check in three days.”
“Did you tell him about the head of the group?”
Angry snorting. “I wanted to, but if I’d said something I would have cursed him and he didn’t deserve it. Like I said, only decent person I spoke to. I did write a letter once I calmed down.” Paper riffling.
“This is remarkably . . . “
“Calm?”
“Yes.”
Sigh. “These days, you have to remember that every fucking thing winds up on the internet. Nothing is sacred anymore, not even customer complaints. I complained in person, your head of the branch took care of the problem and I made a promise to myself never to hire RangeMan again.”
“Ms. Plum, I get enough of arrogant Latino males at home. I have a father, numerous uncles and brothers and all of them think my purpose on this earth is to cook unending pots of rice and beans and have babies! That pisses me off and the last thing I need is one that I pay for, trying to tell me what I should do! Your job is to protect me. The moment you show me your degree from Wharton is the day you can tell me how to run my company.” Indistinct angry mutters from the client on the tape. “I’ve told my female business colleagues to avoid RangeMan. The arrogance of the men is just astounding.” A few deep breaths. “Now I’m pissed before my next meeting. Please leave. I’m sorry to be so rude, but just thinking about that asshole upsets me.”
“Honestly, I hired your company because I met the man in charge and I wanted to fuck him.“
“Armando?” The voice is bewildered.
“Yeah, him too, but no, Carlos Mañoso.” Quiet laughter on the tape. “No joke. They’re both hot and gorgeous but the guys they sent me as bodyguards weren’t bad looking either. Problem was, I always had the feeling that these guys didn’t think much of my mental capabilities. I might be a model but that doesn’t mean I’m stupid. I have an MBA. I’m doing this while I have the body. I can always use the degree, but how many years will I have to take advantage of looking like this?”
“I met with the Head of Client Services for the Miami branch, Ms. Plum. Diego, I believe? Anyway, he was a really nice guy and really polite. He switched my bodyguards and the new guy I got was great. He told me to call him directly if I had any other problems or concerns. It was the only reason I stayed with RangeMan, because I knew the man in charge would listen and take care of the problem the moment I told him.”
This continues for 20 minutes. I can see the men of RangeMan Miami slumping in their seats. Finally the lights go back up and I take a good look across the room. Most men are looking at their feet or at their fingers. My problem employees are staring daggers through me. Armando is blushing. At least three women on the tapes admitted they wanted to sleep with him, when they weren’t complaining about the rest of the men. Four of the clients on the tape were saved due to his direct intervention. Diego had similar comments. None of the comments about Antonio were good and he’s pale and furious.
“Shall we discuss the housekeepers?” The men staring at the floor or their fingers look up. “I asked the housekeepers for their impressions of this branch, not individuals but the branch as a whole. Our RangeMan housekeepers said the EXACT thing these ladies said. For some reason, you men felt you had the right to tell them how to do their jobs! They came in, willing to perform the duties they perform at home, and you men attempted to dictate their job to them three times before you got the point.”
I’m standing at the front, looking at them in astonishment. I still can’t believe that.
“At the moment, you men have lost Maria to San Antonio. She’s only here to determine if she wants to remain here or transfer there and no matter what her decision, Ella and I will support it firmly. You will not get a replacement. At least not until I’m satisfied that a woman working here will receive all the respect and consideration the housekeeper’s position is supposed to get.”
Judging from the stunned looks on their faces and the satisfied look on Maria’s, they get the idea.
“Juan was correct. The survey tests for Hostile and Benevolent Sexism. Here’s the difference.” I find my index card and read the description.
“Ambivalent sexism is an ideology composed of both a “hostile” and “benevolent” prejudice toward women. Hostile sexism is an antagonistic attitude toward women, who are often viewed as trying to control men through feminist ideology or sexual seduction. Benevolent sexism is a chivalrous attitude toward women that feels favorable but is actually sexist because it casts women as weak creatures in need of men’s protection.”
I look out at the men. Most seem to be thinking about what I just read, so I step down and begin handing out survey results. Each man seems to be surprised at his results and the additional information on both types of sexism.
“As you can see, there is no right or wrong answer on this test. It is simply a measurement of your feelings and attitudes towards women, and it’s a test that women can take also. Maria and I both took the test. Hostile and benevolent sexism are scored separately on a 0 to 5 scale and you take the average for the ambivalent sexism score. I scored 0.90 in hostile sexism, but a 1.18 in the benevolent sexism range. Maria scored 3.45 in the benevolent sexism range, which indicates she is a benevolent sexist. Anything above a 2.5 is considered sexist.”
Some of the men are nodding and looking at each other’s scores. The individuals who scored highly in hostile sexism are glaring at me.
I sit down and look at the men. I don’t know what to say here. “Here’s what I know. There isn’t a mole in RangeMan Miami. You guys are loyal to each other, you support each other, and this branch is really tight. All of you gossip too much, but”–I shrug–”that’s RangeMan. The problem is that female intel networks —” I stop and glare at Hal, who smiles.
“Gossip,” he says to the Miami men.
“Have put the word out about you,” I finish. “Pushy, arrogant, rude, dismissive, and condescending were the five words I heard over and over. If you listened carefully to the tapes I played, you should have caught that too.”
Juan raises his hand. “OK, Stephanie, but the entire job of a bodyguard is to protect against all threats. Sometimes these women don’t want to behave as if they get that—”
I cut him off. “And that’s part of your problem, right there! The word ‘behave’.” The room is quiet. “These are grown women, not children! You don’t get to make the decisions about their lives, about their day. You don’t get to tell them what to do. You don’t get to treat them like Barbie dolls!” I am frustrated and silent for a moment, considering how to make my point. Finally, I smile.
“How did you men enjoy guarding my grandmother?”
Hal, Pat, Mack, Diggy, and Thomas all start laughing. Maria leaves the room again. The men are grumbling and glaring at me.
“How many of you understood the point of that?”
No hands.
I shake my head. “Here’s the point. My grandmother is the original difficult client. She spent years doing what everyone else wanted her to do and now that she’s single and free to mingle, she’s going to do just that. You can’t control my grandma. I can’t control my grandma and that’s the point. When I act as bodyguard to her, I know that we’re going to do just what she wants to do. I don’t get to call the shots. I don’t get to make the decisions.
My job is to follow her around and make sure she makes it safely back home. As long as she’s not doing anything illegal or dangerous to her health, I don’t have the right to tell her what to do. Not only is she more than twice my age, she’s a grown woman. She can think for herself.
That was the point of asking you men to guard her. My grandma, like me, doesn’t tolerate being disrespected. She doesn’t like taking orders or being told what to do, but if you treat my grandmother respectfully, present her with alternatives, and gently advise her that perhaps she’s making a bad decision, she’ll listen and perhaps change her mind. If that didn’t work, you were free to call Hal, Diego or me.” I smile at Cent. “I understood you did that when she wanted to go hang gliding.” He nods. “Thank you. She enjoyed that and I appreciate that you were willing to speak to Hector about it. I really can’t thank you enough for treating her right.”
Cent smiles and blushes slightly. I turn to the rest of the men. “That was the right way to ‘handle’ my grandmother. The same way you men are supposed to treat Maria. With respect and consideration, remembering that both my grandmother and Maria are grown women who can make up their own minds. That’s the same way you’re supposed to treat our clients.”
I sit in my chair again and watch faces. The men are looking at each other and at Maria, who stares calmly at all of them.
“At the moment, I’ve told Maria that I think she should go back to San Antonio.” The men look at me, horrified. “My grandmother was a test for all of you. If you could treat her with respect, then I would no longer worry that your behavior toward Maria was just a temporary measure to win her over into staying here. I would be convinced that you meant your words and really wanted Maria to stay. Now I’m more convinced than ever that this behavior is just temporary. You men haven’t really learned to appreciate the housekeeper. You’ve just realized how hard it is to do her job.”
“I’ve served as the CO’s bodyguard enough to know that being a bodyguard means walking a fine line,” Hal says. I’m surprised to see Hal jump in and I’m glad. “You have to be forceful enough to resolve all threats to safety and security, but at the same time you can’t be the authority. The client is still the authority. There has to be respect and understanding on both sides. That’s why I’m serving as the CO’s bodyguard now. We have an understanding between us. I know how to check for threats while still ensuring that she’s in charge.”
Mack stands up and looks out at the men. “Women? Women can feel yo’ ass out in a minute. They feel the shit you don’t say quicker than men. Every man in here knows this. Standard club procedure. It’s how they separate the men from the assholes.” A few chuckles. “Most of the ladies the CO spoke to couldn’t speak, you know, specifically, on anything you said that was disrespectful bold and upfront.
But they not stupid. They combined that shit you said with what you didn’t say and they got it. You were dissin’ ’em and it pissed ’em off. That’s why they fired yo’ asses. You men dis women and their gossip. Man, gossip is powerful shit! It’s costing you major stacks.”
Pat walks over to me and stands next to me. He squeezes my hands and whispers, “Ruiz?”
I nod and he turns back to the men.
“Let’s take Mrs. Ruiz, for example. That’s how we finally figured out how this was happening. Mr. and Mrs. Ruiz contacted you about establishing a bodyguard service for Mrs. Ruiz after they received some threats. They left here thinking they would probably sign with us, since our reputation is the best. Problem is Mrs. Ruiz and Ms. DeJesus are in the same book clubs and women’s groups. Mrs. Ruiz started talking about how she was going to hire a RangeMan bodyguard and Ms. DeJesus overheard. She took Mrs. Ruiz to the side and started telling her about her experience with us.
Next thing you know, the Ruizes are meeting with SecureMan across town and they sign the contract that day. You think someone tipped SecureMan off, because how else would SecureMan have even known the Ruizes were looking for a bodyguard, but that isn’t what happened. One dissatisfied client chatted to a friend and torpedoed the contract before you guys closed the deal.”
The Miami guys are looking at Pat in stunned disbelief.
“You mean, we lost a lucrative contract to gossip?” Ren asks, bewildered. Pat, Mack, Hal, and I nod. “How in the hell do we fight that? Can we even fight it? Women gossip all the time! How could we know we were losing contracts to gossip? Holy shit . . .” He stops and sits, looking scared. The room is getting hostile.
“Yo! I heard about that postin’ shit Ranger does to you in the club. You ever peep what he meant by that?” Mack asks.
“Get off my nightly entertainment?” someone mutters, and there are a few laughs. I roll my eyes.
“No, señor dumbass,” Mack responds, irritated. “That wasn’t what he meant. Yo. Lesson from NYC. Write this shit down.” Mack waits for everyone to pull a piece of paper and a pencil. “‘It takes 20 years to build a reputation and five minutes to ruin it. If you think about that, you’ll do things differently.’ Warren Buffet, muthafuckas.”
There’s snickers, then laughs, then full-blown laughter throughout the room. Even I can’t keep a straight face. Mack smiles but his face gets serious again.
“Laugh all you wanna, but this shit is real! Ranger was trying to tell you from jump. Mind RangeMan’s reputation everywhere, in the club, in the streets, when handling business. Some of you muthafuckas just like me. You can’t get no job anywhere else. So make sure that the reputation of the man giving you a job stays clean. Don’t involve Ranger in no shady shit. You a RangeMan on and off the clock.”
He blows a breath. “You got the same problem NYC has. We had a mole ruining our reputation but we’re clawing it back one contract at a time. It helps that we got a strategist that can establish us with a whole new group of peeps, and we got whole new product lines. You fucked up your reputation in a major product line for you, and you fucked it up with a group that’s gonna remember that shit for years to come.”
The room sobers again. I’m thinking Mack needs just a little more polish and I’m looking at a new strategist.
“Mack is absolutely right.” I look at the men, who are starting to glare at Diego’s ‘league of assholes’. “The results for the branch show a 4.05 score in the benevolent sexism range. That’s way too high for a branch that is hired primarily by women. Again, 62% of our contracts are either directly negotiated by women or contain a woman who is the primary mover in the negotiation.
The women are hearing the gossip about your reputation and, to paraphrase Mack, you’ve dragged Ranger’s name into the mud. Now you have to rebuild it. That takes a lot more work than just maintaining a good rep.” I look at all of them. “And when he gets off this op and takes a look at these numbers and I explain what happened here, I doubt he’s happy. You’re ruining the reputation of the country’s best black-ops leader because you can’t take an order from a woman.”
I sit and take a look at the Miami men. Now they’re starting to get it and they’re pale.
“More disturbing is the results for hostile sexism. The result for the branch was 3.12 percent.” The men sit up in surprise. “You may have thought that the rumors of your sexism were just that, rumors. Unjust, unfair, untrue rumors but they are not. You men have a true problem with women and it is costing us business. Whether it is women in authority or women having the final say in making decisions, you are costing us business.”
The men in the room are pissed and looking at Antonio. He’s clenching his jaw angrily.
I lean back in the chair and stare at the ceiling for a moment before righting myself and staring at the men. “How do I solve this? I don’t know. I don’t know that this can be solved because this isn’t something simple. This gets right to the hearts of your attitudes, right to the heart of who you men are. Don’t just look at Antonio, because it’s not just him. It’s all of you. All of you have high scores and that’s scary.
What I do know is this: this is dangerous for this branch. You have ruined the reputation of RangeMan Miami and if the ‘female intel networks’ continue to push the information about you that they have, this branch will begin to hemorrhage money. If that happens, we may be looking at something RangeMan has never done before: layoffs.”
The very word causes every man in the room to sit up straight, eyes wide.
I hear Antonio in the back mutter, “Not a chance. She doesn’t have the authority,” and it pisses me off.
“You want to repeat that, Antonio?” Silence in the room. Antonio looks up angrily. I’m standing now, red in the face, and yelling at the back of the room. “You want to challenge me on my authority? I have Ranger’s authority. All orders, all requests I hand down are as good as if he had said so himself. He signed the orders to that effect. So do you really want to test me on this? Because I can and will fire you.”
There’s a sharp intake of breath in the room and Antonio goes red. I take a deep breath and grind my teeth together to prevent myself from firing him outright.
“That”–I fling my hand toward him–”is part of the problem. You don’t like what you’re hearing so you dismiss it. After all, it’s only coming from a woman. It’s not important. It’s not relevant. And yet, just like all those women you just heard, I have the power to hire and fire in this company. I’m not irrelevant. You can’t treat me like I don’t matter, but you just did. All of you do, in a hundred small subtle ways.”
I look directly at Antonio. “You want to know why you couldn’t find the mole? Aside from the fact that you weren’t doing a damn thing to find him, there was no mole! I talked to 20 different women, all former clients or lost contracts and consistently they said the same things about you in particular. Rude. Dismissive. Uninterested in their opinions but willing to listen to their husbands or whatever man was in the room. I knew, before I even met with them, that I was going to hear that. Mack saw you do it! He saved a contract that you were about to lose because you have no respect for women!
Worse, these women were still so angry when you went to talk to them that they simply wanted you out of their face. Why? Because you were as dismissive and rude and sexist as all the gossip about you says you are. It spilled over to Armando and Diego when they went to speak to these women. You pissed them off so much that the head of the branch couldn’t even save the situation! They were willing to talk to me only because I’m another woman, which pisses me off because it means that even Ranger might have had a hard time saving those clients.”
This time the gasp is audible. Every man is pale and no one is smiling. I’m clenching my jaw to keep from firing him because I want Armando to do it. I want to see if he has the balls to fire his cousin. I’ll do it if he can’t and then I’ll fire him. That was my only reason for keeping Antonio around. I needed to see the person who drove Mando crazy and see if he was really as bad as everyone said or if they were exaggerating.
They didn’t exaggerate. I was ready to kick him on day one. Mando’s a saint for lasting as long as he did, and I finally understand why Ranger let me drag Trenton down like that: I would not have listened to him. Not then. I believed I was doing fine. I believed I didn’t need help. It wasn’t until I was injured and completely helpless that I finally began to listen to him and all the RangeMen around me. I had six months of hearing people tell me that, although I was a good investigator, I had shit apprehension skills and I never did anything to improve. I was forced to change but I was finally ready to.
Tony won’t change. He’s been brought up to believe he was always right. He’s been brought up to believe women are only here for his needs. Lucia’s information on his family helped me understand that. His problem is fundamental. There’s no way he’ll ever make changes. He’ll simply find someone willing to do as he says, according to Candy.
“So let’s make this personal to all of you. I asked Maria to help me reach out to some special individuals. I wanted to make sure every man in this room understands how this is impacting his life.”
This time the voices were run through a modulator to hide the individual’s identity.
“Maria, I have to admit I like RangeMan and everything you do for the men, but I hate <BLEEP>’s coworkers. They’re rude and arrogant and they seem to think I’m supposed to hop up and fetch them drinks and food when they come over here. I told <BLEEP> that if he wants to host parties with his coworkers, he needs to take that to his mother’s. I bet he won’t allow them to run his momma around like that.”
“I love RangeMan. I love that they gave my brother a job and something to do besides banging but I hate the person he’s become. It’s almost as if he expects Mamí to wait on him hand and foot. Pops kicked him out, told him that no one was gonna run his wife around. Now our family is split in two. Mamí wants Pops to forgive him but Pops said he’s barred till he apologizes. This shit, sorry, this situation is crazy, Maria.”
“He doesn’t know yet, but I’m filing for divorce.” The voice is quiet and tired. “I’ve had it with his arrogance. Before it was cute, more a pride in himself than anything else. He was proud that he could afford to have me at home with our son and still pay all the bills. Now he believes he should run the house and make all the decisions. I’ve gone from being a partner to being an employee and I’m sick of it.”
“Maria, I hated his coworkers! I really did! They’re animals. I was at a club, Club <BLEEP>, and I spotted one. I went over to say hey and I guess he’d either had too much to drink or he didn’t remember me, because the next thing I know he’s got me against a wall trying to pull my underwear off!”
The voice is shaky at the end and the men look horrified. They’re looking around at each other. “It wasn’t until I yelled my brother’s name in his ear that he stopped and really looked at me. I had to tell him that if he kept going I’d tell my brother what happened, and I’m thankful Thomas and Diego were there to stop him. I was too ashamed and embarrassed to tell them what that guy was trying to do to me and I regret that now. I should have said something. What if he did that to another girl?” She breaks into sobs and I can hear Maria soothing her. “My happiest day was when <BLEEP> quit RangeMan.”
The tape plays for twenty minutes. The men are ashen now. Most look ashamed.
“The voices of the women in your lives,” I tell them quietly. “All of them love what RangeMan provides you, but they hate your behavior and the behavior of your brothers. They hate the way you act when all of you are together. Your younger sisters and cousins have seen how you men treat women, in public, in clubs, some of your clients. They’re ashamed and apprehensive. Who are you? Are you their beloved father? Brother? Cousin? Or the asshole they just witnessed?” I look at all of them slowly. “Are you representing the best of RangeMan? Or the worst?”
I step down from the platform and motion for Hal and Mack. Each has an angry look on his face. “Since I didn’t create this problem and I’m one of the many women suffering from this problem, I’m going to leave it on you to solve it. I’ve done my part. When I met with each of our former clients, I let them know that, as the Managing Director, I was going to do something about it. That I’d been disrespected by all of you and I intended to make some changes here. They were interested but they’ll want to see results. So at least the word is out that the woman in charge of RangeMan intends to do something.
My first response is to fire everyone in this branch because almost all of you are over the cutoff of 2.5. Thankfully for you, your new head of HR disagreed with me there. My next best option would be to schedule touchy-feely HR talks and seminars but, as Hal reminds me daily, RangeMan doesn’t do that. We hand you your ass on the mats and since I have no intention to take on all of you on the mats, that’s not an option.
I am having a laugh at the sight of all of you running from my 82-year-old grandmother. Seems there is at least one woman all of you are afraid of.” I’m solemn. “But it’s not enough. The problems in this branch are of your own making, so you solve them. Or I start making up a list of candidates for layoffs.” I hand the branch scores to Armando. “If you can’t solve them, I will fire everyone here and transfer in men from other branches until I can stabilize this one.”
I turn and leave, Hal and Mack right behind me. We’re going to the beach.
Armando’s POV
It’s as if a bomb just went off in this room. No man dares move. Most don’t want to breathe too deeply.
When Steph played the recordings of the women in our lives, men folded. I saw a lot of hands shaking, a lot of deep breaths being taken. That last recording was Sasha Michaels, Ed Michaels’ sister. I remember that night. I was home that night because Alyssa had the flu and was crying for me. The next day, Thomas told me that Julio had come on to any woman who walked within five feet of him that night. It was his birthday and he stayed at the club until they shut down.
Holy shit. My knees are still weak. No wonder Ed resigned a week later and won’t speak to any of us. I’ll need to reach out to him now that I know the truth of what happened.
I look at my scores: 0.82 for Hostile Sexism, 4.00 for Benevolent Sexism. We were just handed evidence that we’re all a bunch of sexist pigs. No wonder Steph wanted me here for this presentation. I’m not exempt.
I cringed when I first saw it. Well, at least I’m not a hostile sexist, but I am flabbergasted at my benevolent sexism score. I do some quick math. Averaged out, I’m at 2.455, right under the cutoff for ‘sexist pig’. I never would have believed it but I have the results here in black and white.
Worse than that, I listened to the tapes Steph played very closely. I caught all the buzzwords she mentioned except pushy, and the more I heard ‘arrogant’ and ‘condescending’, the more I mentally cringed. I think about the guys in the bodyguard department of client services and I’ll bet, without looking at this piece of paper Steph just handed me, that I know who the highest scorers will be in Hostile Sexism.
I make a quick mental list then review the branch results. Dead on.
Danny was right. She’s sharp. We thought we had a mole and we don’t. We simply have bad ratings from women and they’re gossiping about us. The word is getting out that we’re sexist. It’s no longer an in-house RangeMan joke; it’s a known fact. That’s what is causing us problems.
Gossip. So fucking obvious and yet, the last thing we considered.
The room is silent. All the men are looking at me so I move to the front of the room. I don’t know what to say.
“I don’t know what to say,” I mutter. The room is still silent. “I knew we had a reputation within the company for being sexist in this branch but, like the CO said, I dismissed that. Our bigger problem was the mole. Now I find that we don’t have a mole. We’re just sexist assholes.” I look up at the men.
“Armando,” Antonio begins, standing, “I don’t buy these results. I mean, maybe the CO wants to make a point and since she can’t actually find the real mole, she just decided to toss this at us. I’m looking at my scores and this is bullshit.”
I’m sure you think so since you scored the highest in hostile sexism. Men all around the room are silent and I finally, clearly, see the extent of the problem. Benevolent sexism strikes again. Thank you, Stephanie, for removing the wool from my eyes.
I sigh. “You’ve just proven her point yet again, Antonio. You don’t like what you’ve just heard, so you’re dismissing the CO. Sit down and shut up!” I point as Antonio opens his mouth to complain. “You would prefer that we have a mole in this branch, that we have a disloyal RangeMan, than consider that some of you might be sexist pigs.”
I shake my head. “Men, there isn’t one of us in this room that came out clean. Everyone had a benevolent sexism score above 2.5. I myself scored at 4.0 and that shocks and scares me.” I look at the men, who are looking at their scores again. Some are writing down my score.
“I’m the father of two little girls and a son on the way. My job in life is to prepare them for the world they will enter as adults, and what I’m realizing is that I wouldn’t want my daughters to date anyone who treated them as if they were feeble. I wouldn’t want them to date any man that didn’t treat them with respect. I don’t know that I would like them to date a man like me, not with these scores.”
I sit heavily and exhale. That honestly hurts. I want my girls to see me as a man to be admired, but I look at the questions correlated with benevolent sexism and I realize that I answered ‘yes’ for the majority of them. There’s an interesting notation from Steph in the margin: Madonna/Whore? I take a few minutes to truly consider the questions and her notation and how they could be considered sexist and the light bulb goes off in my head. No wonder my attitude adjustment failed. I’m part of the problem.
“I want everyone to raise their hands if they agree with the following statements.” The men look at me in curiosity, so I make quick notes next to the ones I know I answered ‘yes’ to.
No matter how accomplished he is, a man is not truly complete as a person unless he has the love of a woman. Half the men raise their hands, chuckling as they do.
Many women have a quality of purity that few men possess. Half the men raise their hands.
Women should be cherished and protected by men. Every man raises his hand, most nodding.
Every man ought to have a woman whom he adores. Half the men raise their hands.
A good woman should be set on a pedestal by her man. Again, every man raises his hand, some nodding.
Women, compared to men, tend to have a superior moral sensibility. Almost every man raises his hand.
I look out at the men. “Every question I just asked you is related to benevolent sexism. I didn’t get it until I thought about it in terms of my own actions and I finally understand. It’s the Madonna/Whore syndrome. Either a woman is a Madonna to be placed on a pedestal and worshipped or a whore to be used and discarded. Problem is, I’m not married to either one.”
A few of the men chuckle and there are some smiles around the room.
“I’m married to Mariela, my partner in life. She would roll her eyes at some of these statements. She would tell me it’s awfully hard to make love on top of a pedestal.” This finally gets the first real laughter in the room. I chuckle then raise my hands for attention.
“I choose to believe the CO. This isn’t her first stop. This is her fourth and on three previous stops, she was able to fix the problems in those branches to the point that they’re making money hand over fist. Even NYC is making bank again.”
The men are looking at me in confusion and surprise.
“No way, Mando!” Pedro exclaims. “They were in the toilet! No way they’re making bank this fast.”
I nod, a wry smile on my face. “It’s true. Javi’s month to month figures show 22% growth each month. He’s 2nd in the company now, like Mack said. That’s how well they’re doing. Considering he was in the toilet, it means he’s bringing his branch back fast and he did it by asking the CO for help.” I look at all the men. “All I hear from the other XOs is that the CO listens. She works with you to get you where you want to be. She isn’t going to beat your ass. She’s respectful of you as long as you are respectful of her. And she’s a good detective. Men, the CO has been here for two weeks and she’s been able to determine that we don’t have a mole. Our problem is within our own hearts.
A 4.05 benevolent sexism score means that women aren’t comfortable with us and if 62% of our contracts are negotiated or finalized by women, then she’s right. We’re going to lose business. I know that one of the things that Lester is most proud of is the fact that we’ve never had layoffs in this company, so if the CO is threatening the possibility, we need to take that seriously.”
I look across the room and drop my blank face into place. “She was absolutely correct in saying that she has Ranger’s full authority. The day you received the email with the news was the day he told us in person. She has the power to hire and fire. She can choose to shut down this branch. She can do whatever she pleases as long as the Leadership Core agrees and, according to Javi, Danny, and Hal, they’ve given her full authority. Free rein. They’re so happy with everything she’s accomplished that she can do as she pleases.”
I can see that the news is finally starting to sink into everyone’s skulls. The CO has unlimited power. She IS Ranger.
“I don’t know how to solve this problem either. I do know this: Those of you who scored the highest in hostile sexism need to meet with me. Today. You’ll receive a time soon. Every man in this branch needs to think about ways to solve this problem. Wednesday afternoon, we’ll meet again and discuss what to do.”
I stare every man in the face. Some won’t meet my eyes. “Every man in this room, including me, is part of the problem. Now, we need to find the solution.”
Sooo wish I was fly. On. Wall with mando and the crew of assholes..